Yesterday Brad and I met with Dr. Shawna Blackman and Dr. Reardon about the possibility for surgery on Brad's lungs. After discussing Brad's past 2 years of medical history and looking over Brad's most recent CT scan, it was decided that we would first need to see if Brad could tolerate chemotherapy. The problem with the chemo that is recommended in this case is that first, it would be unlikely to control the disease (thus being the reason we have not chosen that option for Brad sooner) and second, the chemo would effect his heart and most likely cause fluid to build up on the lungs. Brad said that it would be very difficult for him to voluntarily chose a treatment for himself at this point that would negatively effect his resperation. He said that he couldn't imagine having any more difficulty breathing than he has already.
Dr. Blackman and Dr. Reardon feel that surgery would not be wise if the tumor growth on the left lung continues to grow & so far we have not sucessfully found any treatment to stop the tumor growth. Dr. Reardon stressed that he only does surgery if it will accomplish one of two things: either extending a person's life or increasing their quality of life. He said that at this moment he could not look Brad in the eyes and say that it would do either of those 2 things.
Dr. Blackman will be discussing with Dr. Lehane about chemo options for Brad. Dr. Lehane, being Brad's main oncologist, would be the one to determine a chemo plan for Brad, should he believe that Brad's body could tolerate some form of treatment at this point.
So, we are waiting to hear back from Dr. Lehane to see what he suggests for Brad. If he suggests chemo and if Brad choses to try that treatment, then we will see if the chemo reduces the tumor size in his lungs. If it does, then Dr. Blackman and Dr. Reardon will consider doing surgery.
While the information we heard was not surprising to either of us, it didn't make it any easier to hear. We know that no matter how desperate the situation gets, God can always intervene and take the cancer from Brad's body. We continue to gather strength from this knowledge. No matter how impossible everything looks....we will cling to this fact. God can make a way. Miracles happen every day and I will continue to pray that we receive one.
Until then I am continuing to focus on all for which I am thankful.
-I am thankful for sleep. Although we have both been overwhelmed with emotions, we have been very blessed with sleep each night. Thank you God for watching over us each night and for helping Brad sleep.
-Despite the emotional high/lows in our home, our children have been very strong and stable. In other difficult times, the kids have been very upset and very clingy to me. They have been very connected to their Daddy recently. Each morning I wake up to the sight of them climbing into bed with Brad to give him hugs and to cuddle with him. In the afternoon they play games, read stories and watch movies together. It is wonderful. Nothing could make me happier than to witness them expressing their love to their Daddy in this way. There is nothing I enjoy more than seeing a father playing with his children.
-I am thankful for our friends, family, & church who never fail to amaze me with their abundant support.
-I am thankful for a lessened cough. Brad felt a little better today and coughed a little less. We were able to spend some time together in meditation and relaxation which also seemed to help.
-I am thankful for time. God did not promise me today, but we were given it as a gift. I so appreciate that time that I have been given to share with Brad and our family.
Thanks for all of your prayers and support. We love you all.