Fun At The Park

While we were in Granbury we had the opportunity to meet with Whitney and her two kiddos. We had a great time having a picnic lunch and playing in the sunshine.

Eligah & Aydia are like Zeke & K...they love to swing! So, we spent a good amount of time on the swings. Zeke took this opportunity to show off his swing leaping skills. I personally think he was just trying to flirt with Whitney...showing her all his moves :)

Thank you Whitney for blessing our day with your beautiful company! We love you!





Thank you Whitney for letting me swipe some of your photos from that day!

Swinging With Granddad

Tee Time

Granddad & Nonnie live in Pecan Plantation, right off the main golf course. We arrived last week on Wednesday which just so happens to be the day that the course is closed. We took advantage of that opportunity to let Zeke & K take a few strokes on the green. Kaelyn mostly enjoyed just running around chasing balls like a maniac but Zeke was a more serious golfer...taking pride in using his "stick."

Birthday Fun

Here are some fun pictures from my multiple birthday celebrations. This is taken during our spa getaway at the Houstonian. For the first picture, I will leave the participants as anonymous for their own protection. I know that the girls are going to LOVE this portrait of us during our "pampering time." Scary!!
Thank you ladies for planning this little getaway...it was wonderful!!

Me & my mamasita.

Me & Val celebrating at the Hanna's on the evening of St. Patti's Day. Bill grilled some delicious burgers & Sandra made my favorite dessert, Boston creme pie...yum!

Dad bought me a St. Patrick's Day shirt and took me to an Irish Pub for lunch. Nothing like a little fish & chips to celebrate.

Jen & Paige took me to Rice Village (one of my favorite spots) for dinner, a little shopping, and dessert. It was so much fun to get a chance to sit & chat for several hours. I just LOVE these 2 ladies...they are such a blessing in my life.

Well we made it back to home-sweet-home! It was really nice to get away for 5 days...to be in another house in another town, away from my home phone, without my cell phone (S&D are so far out in the booneys that I can't even pick up cell service)...it really was a nice break from everything. With the change of environment...it was even a break for my brain...I found myself able to dwell on other thoughts, different thoughts...which was nice. The year 2009 my find me traveling a lot :)

I think I am going to slip off to bed early tonight...something new. Thank you for your continued thoughts and prayers for our family. We continue to feel consumed by all your love and support....we love you all.

How Am I? How Are We?

I have to admit that I have been avoiding my blog the last week or so. I'm not sure exactly what the underlying reason is, but I have. I guess my mind has been all over the place...so I haven't been able to focus on what to say or how to say it. Ok, so a small reason has been because of my schedule....I have been pretty busy...I have had quite a few birthday celebrations this past week. Brad has always poked fun at me for my ability to celebrate my birthday, not only on the 17th, but for the entire month of March. I know that in his eyes, this month is no exception :)

So, I will try to answer the question that seems to come up most frequently right now. How are we doing? How am I doing? I think, as a whole, we are doing as well as we can under these circumstances. Right now we are visiting Granbury with Sandra & David. In this new environment, Zeke has certainly been more anxious and VERY clingy to me. He is my little shadow & if I leave his side for a moment he is instantly calling for me. I actually expected this behavior to come immediately after Brad's crossing over, so for it to only appear now, in a different place, is a big blessing.

Little K is the same....just as crazy as ever. She is still asking, "where daddy?" and I am still struggling to find a way to tell her where he is. She is her brother's copycat...so right now if he is calling for me/wanting me to hold him...so is she.

As for myself, I miss my friend. The hardest part of this experience is that as I struggle, the one person on this earth that I reveal everything, is not here to hold and to pour my heart out to. Brad had an unbelievable way of showing me how to let go of my fears and to give it to God. I had such a calming influence on him and in my more difficult moments...he always had the same effect on me. On one of his last night's here, he was fast asleep in our bed and I was crying my eyes out all over him....literally all over him. The poor guy was sound asleep and I couldn't seem to pull myself together to keep from waking him up. He woke up for a moment, stroked my hair gently and told me everything was going to be alright. He then quickly directed me to have a glass of wine (his prescription for me anytime I couldn't sleep.) :)

The physical pain caused by the grief has also been surprising to me. No matter how much I keep moving forward and try to reassure myself, the grief pain is still there some days and cannot be ignored. I find this pain to be very similar to the emotional pain that Brad had the last few days. There was a point that he reached in which there was nothing I could do to distract or take away that pain...he just had to go through it. And that is where I am right now...I know that it will get better...but right now, I just have to move through the pain. Face it, feel it and move through it.

In these moments, I am especially thankful for my children. They have such a sweet innocence that keeps me focused on what is important and true. Zeke and I have always had a close connection and through this emotional struggle we have come to be even closer. He has an amazing way of verbalizing thoughts about his Daddy and these thoughts seem to be brought up at just the same moment I am thinking them too. Even though he is only five, he has such a tender heart and a sweet spirit...I am so blessed to have the opportunity to learn from him.

Tonight the kids and I were able to take some time to go down to the river and play in the water. They found such joy in throwing rocks, scooping mud, and splashing each other. There is something about nature that brings me right to God. I felt His presence and felt that I was also able to connect with Brad. I kept thinking about what Brad would have been doing if he were there with us....I'm sure that we would have had Bucky and Brad would have been throwing the ball for him, into the water so that Bucky could retrieve it. I'm sure that Bucky would have clumsily run over the children, knocking them completely into the water and I'm certain he would have shook water all over Brad. Brad would probably have shown Zeke how to skip rocks. I tried to show Zeke, but I must confess....I'm not a very skilled rock-skipper. In fact, during my lesson, Zeke held the record for most jumps by his rock with 4....my best was 2. I know, embarrassing.

In a quieter moment I was able to sit back, watch K & Zeke play and take in the beauty of my surroundings. The sky, the water, the cool evening air were all so calming. The simple pleasure of that moment gave me a sense of peace as if Brad were telling me again, everything is going to be alright.

On the ride home from the viewing, Zeke shared this question.
Z: Once you get to heaven, if you ask God, can you come back if you want to?

J: I think once you get to heaven you don't want to come back because...

Z: ...Because you are so happy and because it is so beautiful and the food tastes great and the drinks taste better and better the more you drink them.


On Friday night, as I am putting Zeke to bed, right after our prayers
Z: You know, God doesn't always grant your wishes when you asked them.

J: That's right Zeke

Z: ...because I asked God to make my Daddy's leg be better and he didn't

J: Sometimes I think God decides that He knows it is better for you to come to Heaven with Him.

Z: My Daddy was going to ride bikes with me and wrestle and play.

J: You are right Zeke...your Daddy wanted to do those things with you more than anything. He will get to do them with you some day when we are all together again. We can look forward to that.

Monday Night, just before Zeke & I went in to see Brad's body together.

J: Zeke, Daddy has been sick for a very long time. He has been hurting and having a lot of trouble breathing....today God decided to take him to Heaven to be with Him. Right now Daddy's body is laying on our bed. He looks like he is asleep but really his spirit has already left his body to be in Heaven with God. In a minute, I want to take you in there and let you see his body. You can touch him if you want to, but he won't wake up because he has already gone to be with God.

Z: So I am going to be here with you and Kaelyn and Nonnie and Granddad?

J: That's right Baby.

Z: Why didn't Granddad go first?

That same night, as Granddad put Zeke to bed.

Z: My daddy died and he has gone to Heaven to be with God.

Granddad: That's right Zeke.

Z: We are going to live here together for a long time, I'm going to live a long life...unless I get sick.

G: You're not going to be sick Zeke...you are going to live a long time.

Z: When we get old and die we will go to heaven and see my daddy.

G: That's right.

Z: Granddad, you will go first because you are old. ;)

Brad's sweet cousin, Ashton ("Brother Ashton" in Zeke's eyes) wrote this in honor of Brad.

Bradley's Emancipation.

My cousin Brad, he was and still is I believe to be the greatest young Christian man I have ever known. I remember him always coming over after school and taking care of me, playing outside and spending the night at his house. He was great to me. Brad is the person I have looked up to for years and he has set an example of how I want to be.

I found out earlier this evening that he had passed away at 3:00 today. He was eaten up with cancer, and I have no clue why this awful case would come upon him, Jenny, Zeke, K and the rest of our family. He has fought this bravely, and stayed a strong, loving husband and dad to his family.

Brad's a survivor, he has fought and won his goal in life, to go to heaven and he did. Althought we miss him we are...in a way, glad that his suffering has been lifted. I could go on forever telling the great things about Brad. He DOES NOT want us to remember his as he has been, but how he was and those are the memories I choose to remember. Brad is free from the cancer, he is finally free. Love you.

Thank you Ashton for those touching, heart-felt words. I know that Brad is looking down on you, beaming with pride at the young man you have become. He has always been so proud of you Ash.

Directions

This is Lisa. I have been informed that this weekend a portion of I-45 will be closed, and most anyone coming to the memorial service would come down I-45, I would suspect. The portion that is closed is actually past the exit used to get to the church, but traffic could easily be backed up past that exit, as well as that is the last exit before the closure. A friend of mine has given some alternative routes you might want to consider. You can still do I-45, but you would need to give plenty of extra time! If you still have questions, you can call the church for more information. My understanding is that someone will be answering phones there even on Saturday.

From Eastbound Sam Houston Toll Road
Exit Beamer Rd and go south for 4.5 miles until Beamer Rd becomes Tall Ships Dr. Turn left at Pilrims Point Dr. The rear entrance to the church is on Pilgrims Point Dr, 1/4 mile past El Dorado Blvd. It is Grist Mill, the first left after Planters Way,

From Westbound Sam Houston Toll Road
Go south on Hwy 3 and turn right on El Dorado Blvd. Go over I-45 and turn left on Pilgrims Point Dr. The rear entrance to the church is on Pilgrims Point Dr, 1/4 mile past El Dorado Blvd. It is Grist Mill, the first left after Planters Way.

Arrangement Information

Here is the information and schedule for the visitation and memorial service:

Visitation: Thursday, March 5, 6-8 pm at Rosewood Funeral Home: 3939 Pasadena Blvd, Pasadena, Tx, 713-920-2171.

Wims Fun Run: Saturday, March 7, 8:00 am, at Clear Creek High School.

Memorial Service: Saturday, March 7, 2 pm, at Southeast Church of Christ: 2400 W. Bay Area Blvd, Friendswood, Tx, 281-992-2168.

In lieu of flowers, the family requests that contributions be made to the Brad Wims Memorial Fund for his children's education. This account has been set up through the Southeast Church of Christ. Please contact the church office at the above number for more information.

There Is Much Rejoicing In Heaven

On Monday, March 2nd, at 2:45pm my sweet husband was called Home to be with Jesus. Just moments before, Brad's breathing had become heavily laboured as his final moments on this earth came to a close. Brad had known for the past several days that he was soon to close his earthly chapter of life and enter the realm of peace & comfort that he could only imagine.

In those final moments we were able to express our deep love for him and cradle his sweet face in our arms. He left my arms and the arms of his mother & father to enter the welcoming embrace of his Heavenly Father. We know there was much rejoicing in heaven as this faithful servant joined in amongst the angels.

Oh, how we will miss this man. These moments are so bitter sweet. I am relieved that he is no longer suffering, I am so proud for the fight he fought, I am so glad that he is rejoicing in heaven, I can only smile as I think of him embracing his older brother, Brett....but oh, what a big hole has been taken from my heart. There is such an unfillable void....Brad's fun-loving spirit, his unbelievable energy, his humor, his joy for life, and love for our family were immeasurable.

Nothing in my life up to this point has prepared me for the pain of being without him. And in those quiet moments of despair....all I want to do is have him hold me and tell me everything will be alright. It is so hard to grieve the loss of the very person who you rely on so heavily for comfort in those dark times.

Well Honey...you don't have to imagine anymore.
What did your eyes see when you stood before Him?
Did you dance or did you stand in awe?
I know that it must be magnificent and glorious.. and I can only imagine.

Zeke asked me today what I thought his Daddy was doing in heaven right now. I said, "I'm not sure...what do you think he is doing?" His response: "I think he is running." And, I'm sure that he is right....running fast and breathing freely with a great big smile across his precious face.

Yet again, mid-day seemed to be the hardest for Brad. He got into another coughing spell that just wouldn't let him rest. It is so difficult for him to cough at this point because his poor lungs just can't seem to get any wind behind them to push anything out. The coughing makes him super dizzy and really tired and then not being able to breathe easily makes him feel very emotional....I just know he must feel so helpless right now.

He is doing better again this evening after a nice, long rest this afternoon. We just finished saying prayers together with Nonnie and Brad very specifically asked God to take his cough away for two days and to also give him enough energy tomorrow to get out of bed to do his treatments and to see his family. He asked for forgiveness during his prayer for struggling to believe that God still could/would heal him. I am so moved by his openess and honesty with the Lord about his struggles and doubt. He is such an amazing man.

This afternoon wee were once again blessed with a personal bedside concert, given by our praise team. As I sat back and listened to this sing, I thought to myself, "yes, this must be a taste of what heaven feels like." Nothing stirs the heart like songs of praise to our Lord.

We love you and thank you for your prayers.